More "Gotcha!" Journalism

I'm almost beginning to feel sorry for Sarah Palin. Katie Couric asks her where she gets her news in Alaska, how she stays in touch with national and world events:





I would feel sorry for her, but she's had plenty of time to prepare for these "gotcha" questions. And she's had plenty of time to remove herself from the ticket, but has chosen to plow ahead anyway. Let's not forget her college major: journalism. Gotcha.

Today's Banned Book

So many challenged and banned books, so little time. Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse Five is part of my Top 10 Favorite books (banned or otherwise). He survived the bombing of Dresden after being captured by the Germans in WWII, and left us this "post-modern anti-war science-fiction novel."

In the interest of equal time for opposing viewpoints, here's Linda Harvey's take on the "smoke screen of hypocrisy" behind Banned Books Week. Not sure how much credit I should give to an article that appears with an ad promoting "how you can flush 5-20 pounds of waste from your colon," so I'll let you decide. So it goes.

UPDATE: Just found this from "banned" author Philip Pullman (The Golden Compass) - Linda Harvey's efforts are futile.

Nobel Chief Thumbs Literary Nose at American Writers

Seems that European authors are the only ones worth reading, according to the Nobel Literature Chief:

"The U.S. is too isolated, too insular. They don't translate enough and don't really participate in the big dialogue of literature," Engdahl said. "That ignorance is restraining."

And American writers respond with a verbal volley of their own:

"You would think that the permanent secretary of an academy that pretends to wisdom but has historically overlooked Proust, Joyce, and Nabokov, to name just a few non-Nobelists, would spare us the categorical lectures," said David Remnick, editor of The New Yorker.

It's a step above "Your mama!" and "I know you are, but what am I?"

Column of the Day - P.J. O'Rourke

Conservative funny man (there are some out there) P.J. O'Rourke has cancer. That's not funny. The good news is it's treatable and he has an excellent chance for a full recovery. He also has his trademark sardonic sense of humor:

I have, of all the inglorious things, a malignant hemorrhoid. What color bracelet does one wear for that? And where does one wear it? And what slogan is apropos? Perhaps that slogan can be sewn in needlepoint around the ruffle on a cover for my embarrassing little doughnut buttocks pillow.

Here's hoping for a speedy and complete recovery.

Meanwhile, back at the War on Terror

NBC's Richard Engel blogs about his encounter with Taliban sympathizers and those who fear the return of radical Islamists in Karachi, Pakistan. A key exchange:

According to Karachi’s former mayor Farooq Sattar, there are now more than 2,000 illegal madrassas in Karachi alone. This was one of them.

"What do you think of the Taliban and their influence here?" I asked the students.

More blank stares.

"What do you think about the U.S. incursions?"

That got a reaction.

"God willing, we will fight them," said one teenager with a purple scar on his chin. "They are the enemy," he said and launched into a long explanation of America’s goal to occupy Muslim lands and undermine Islam. I’ve heard the same speech from Cairo to Lebanon, Baghdad to Riyadh. God bless the Internet.

A few minutes later my driver/fixer, a very tough guy from a very tough part of Pakistan, tapped me on the shoulder.

"I think you have been here long enough," he said. It was time to go.

Aarrrgh! All these pirates want is respect, and $20 million

Not exactly Cap'n Jack Sparrow and company, these Somali pirates. All they want is

$20 million in cash — “we don’t use any other system than cash.” But he added that they were willing to bargain. “That’s deal making,” he explained.

Time's Top 10 Banned Books

Some of the most controversial books of all time, in Time, this week.

"It's all about 'gotcha' journalism. . . "

". . . but that's okay, too." Senator McCain sits in with Governor Palin for the latest Katie Couric interview. It's like watching the last place couple on "The Newlywed Game".

With great truthiness comes great, um. . .

Well, the writers at Marvel will figure it out when Stephen Colbert appears with Spiderman in an upcoming issue. American patriot, superhero sidekick - Stephen Colbert!

Obama returns to GR

Field trip, anyone? 

Bailout Bill Blame

Senator McCain (he of campaign "suspension" fame) blames House Speaker Pelosi's pre-vote speech for the GOP change of heart on the bailout bill. A closer look shows that representatives in tight races were the ones most likely to vote against it. Those with little chance of losing their seats voted nearly even for or against it. 

Today's Banned Book

Curtis Sittenfeld gets press these days for her latest novel, American Wife, featuring a character based loosely on Laura Bush. But her first effort, Prep, examines the life of a female high school student without pulling a single punch. It's uncomfortable, graphic, and honest. And, I'd wager, very similar to what many parents would find in their daughters' diaries. 

So much for retiring at 60

Lessee. . . no bailout agreement, and the Dow drops nearly 7% for its biggest one-day point loss in history. Maybe I need to get working on that novel-that-becomes-part-of-English-classrooms-worldwide plan instead. 

If you can't find me this weekend, it's because I'm out collecting pop cans.

Today's Banned Book

The Kite Runner, by Khaled Hosseini. We just happen to be reading it in APE Lit right now. Purely coincidental. Listed on the APE Literature exam the past two years. (Sarcasm spoiler alert!)  A book like that can't possibly have any redeeming value. Let's ban it. 

A little good news - every day

Let's begin the week with some good news, courtesy of the Good News Network. I think I'll be linking here often. 

UPDATE (9/29): They want us to PAY for good news! No thanks. I'll dig it up myself. Must be some around here somewhere.

Read a Banned Book!

It's Banned Books Week - celebrate your right to read! Here's a list of the most frequently challenged and/or banned books from the past year. For more West Michigan BBW info, check your local library, or the best place for new books, Schuler Books and Music. 

In case you missed it

Good news, bad news

Good news! The Office is back! Bad news! We have to wait until October 9 for the next episode. Good news! It's pre-empted next Thursday for the Vice Presidential Debate, which could provide as many uncomfortable comic moments as a typical Office episode. Really good news! A preview of the next show:

David Foster Wallace's final days

Salon's Robert Ito examines the painful, haunting days of David Foster Wallace. Please read this. It is heartbreaking. And if you know of anyone who lives with clinical depression, keep in touch with them.  To those who know me, I'm fine. Thanks for checking in. 

Rock n roll, Cleveland!

The Rock n Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremonies return to the home of the hall, Cleveland, Ohio, next year. This years nominees include Metallica (sure), Run DMC (very good), and Chic (WHAT?!). 

The fine folks at Gibson would like a word with the RHoF about these deserving bands who aren't nominated. As for me, I'd like to see The Cars, Genesis, and Electric Light Orchestra get a little RHoF love. 

"Those who do not study the past get an exciting opportunity to repeat it."

The power of Stewart and access to presidential speeches on videotape:

The world is watching - let's debate!

Intriguing questions about foreign policy from world leaders in today's NY Times. From the president of Pakistan:

How would you work with America’s allies in the Muslim world to turn around the widely held misperception there, as evidenced in opinion polls, that the global war against terrorism is actually a war against Islam?

Step one: Speak out against hate-filled propaganda like "Obsession"

Once a temp, always a temp

Ryan's back! And he's as obnoxious as ever. Season Five of The Office is off an running, and if you've enjoyed it, you have Ryan/B.J. Novak to thank. 

Veep Candidate, 2028?

Best use of a Venn diagram during Campaign 08

From Indexed.

Yippee Ki Yay!

Now entering the presidential race: John McClane, with running mate Hans Gruber. (Warning: link has Bruce Willis, cliched action movie dialogue)

All the people

That they may all be one.

Must See Political TV

We're all tired of the shouting and smirking of pundits on both sides of the aisle. In just two weeks, Rachael Maddow has returned civility and critical thinking to political discourse. Not a moment too soon. The American Prospect examines her unusual rise to host of her own cable show here.

Moore free stuff!

Michael Moore fans can download his new documentary, "Slacker Nation", at no charge. Michael Moore haters will think he's charging too much. 

No deposit, no return

Especially if the beer truck you steal is empty. 

Someday, we'll look back on this and laugh. I hope.

And they say Al Franken is helping SNL. . . really now, with stories like this, who needs comedy writers?

It seems that today during the time Barack Obama was waiting to hear back from Sen. McCain about their planned joint statement -- and while McCain says he was meeting with key advisors and becoming increasingly concerned about the financial crisis facing the country -- he was actually holding a special meeting with Lady Lynn Forester de Rothschild, the expat international financier who once supported Hillary Clinton but now is supporting McCain because she thinks Obama is "elitist".

Can't blog now, must eat dark chocolate

Good news in troubling times. . . 6.7 grams of dark chocolate a day keeps heart inflammation away!

What's the matter, McFly - er, McCain - chicken?

The McCain campaign proposes to postpone Friday's debate so the senator can attend to national affairs. And if that doesn't happen, they've proposed moving it to the date of the VP debate, which would take place on a "date yet to be determined." Like November 5, perhaps. 

Another blow for the Bratz franchise

Scholastic, Inc. decided to drop the Bratz books and merchandise from their elementary school book fairs. Before anyone cries censorship (especially a few days before Banned Books Week), let's ask the question, "Do we really want our young girls reading Hootchie Barbie books?"

I think not. 

A little good news - FREE!

How'd you like a free download of a live collaboration between Wilco and Fleet Foxes? You know you want it. All you gots to do is pledge to vote this November, and their cover of "I Shall Be Released" shall be thine. 

You're welcome. 

Foreign Policy Speed Dating

Or, how Sarah Palin spent the day with various world leaders, no doubt discussing which countries they can see from their backyards. . . 

Cover me!

The American Society of Magazine Editors announced the finalists for Magazine Cover of the Year. Here's one of my favorites.

Dying to Write: The Obituary

Interesting Q & A with the NY Times' obit writer, Bruce Weber. Not a bad writing gig, really.

Today's Moment of Idiocy

I suppose mentioning idiocy and Rush Limbaugh in the same breath is redundant. But today's claim is asinine:

For the record, Obama's father was born in Kenya, which is NOT an Arab country. It is African.

Would you like $2293.36?

So, the gov'ment wants to spend $700 billion of our taxes to bailout Wall Street. Why not give it to the taxpayers (and their children) instead? Couldn't you use an extra $2293.36 in the ol' checkbook?

Economic Crisis Hits NPR

Sort of. From The Onion:

Cash-Strapped NPR Launches 'A Couple Things Considered'

Deja vu all over again

From Marginal Revoluion. 

Bail, Taxpayers, Bail!

I won't make claims to know exactly what went wrong with Wall Street, but I do know a constitutional problem when I see it:

Decisions by the Secretary pursuant to the authority of this Act are non-reviewable and committed to agency discretion, and may not be reviewed by any court of law or any administrative agency.

That's part of the proposed bailout that would let the fat cats off while taxpayers pick up the tab. "Non-reviewable"? "By any court of law"? Where's the democracy in that? Where's the system of checks and balances? 

"Death of a Genius"

David Foster Wallace, author of Infinite Jest, left this earth far too soon. He struggled with chronic depression for two decades, and his passing left an incredible void in the literary world. McSweeney's Internet Tendency, a must-bookmark for the lit lover, devotes its entire front page to remembrances of this talented, troubled mind. 

"Ruthless Pragmatism"

That's how a former student of Barack Obama describes a potential Obama presidency. The NY Times examines how Obama's teaching at the University of Chicago is a glimpse of what might be next January:

Tom Hynes, who took racism and the law in 1996, agrees that Obama’s openness and the seminar discussions he encouraged were highly unusual. “That class was a catalyst to examine biases you might have developed throughout your own life,” said Hynes, who now works in finance. “Obama had a way of getting you to think and talk about issues people generally don’t like to think and talk about.”

If you build a better mousetrap, college-search site, etc.

Those bulky college ranking magazines are on the shelves, and the fall college fairs are just around the corner. Both are decent sources for info on your dream school, but wouldn't it be nice to hear from the college students themselves? Unigo allows you to do just that. The story of how it came to be can be found here. 

More local reaction to "Obsession"

A trio of Bosnian American Muslims expressed their disappointment with the GR Press for its inclusion of the "Obsession" DVD in last Sunday's edition. Key quote:

"Bosniaks are proud citizens of the U.S. and seek to have a relationship of mutual understanding with fellow Americans of all faiths. This DVD and the unfortunate fact that The Press allowed such hate-filled misrepresentations to be published calls into question its commitment to informing the public as a source of serious journalism."

But does it listen to My Bloody Valentine?

Pink Arrow Update

From the Freep, Mick McCabe's article gets to the heart of the Pink Arrow Project. Keep the Kleenex handy.

A Pair of Pundits in GR - Column of the Day

The WaPo's George Will and E.J. Dionne dropped by yesterday to speak at separate events. Dionne examines the possibility of Michigan being this year's equivalent of Florida in 2000.

An ad about nothing

Nothing will come of nothing. So sayeth King Lear, and so sayeth Microsoft. They've yanked the Seinfeld/Gates ads. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Is 'Obsession' freedom of speech?

In the most basic sense of the First Amendment, the "Obsession" DVD inserted as an advertisement in many swing state newspapers last Sunday (including The Grand Rapids Press), is an example of Freedom of Speech. And that's the excuse many newspaper editors relied on to justify its being sandwiched between Meijer and Best Buy inserts. 

Paid advertisements aren't the best example of freedom of speech. How, for example, could someone with an opposing view of the DVD have a chance to express those ideas without having to shell out thousands of dollars? The best most newspapers offer is a Letters to the Editor section, and those letters are often limited to 250 words or less. Not quite the same as a 60-minute DVD.

Some papers had the chance to run the ad, but didn't. The editor of the Greensboro (NC) News & Record explained their decision this way:

"I asked our publisher about it. He said it was divisive and plays on people's fears and served no educational purpose. The revenue it would have brought in was not a motivator."

I've watched "Obesssion", because if there's one thing I can't stand, it's people who criticize something without having seen/read/heard it. In my opinion, it is a thinly-veiled attempt to paint the Muslim faith with an ugly broad brush. The writers try to qualify their presentation on Islamic extremists by briefly mentioning that not all Muslims feel the same way. But there is next to no attempt to elaborate on what Islam is about (or any mention that there is a history of Christian extremists). As a film, it is poorly produced. As an argument, it is extremely one-sided and filled with appeals to emotion. That's not an argument. That's propaganda. And I can't fathom why a reputable newspaper - whether the GR Press or NY Times - would accept advertising revenue to run it. 

Stump The Candidate

I missed most of the McCain/Palin townhall meeting yesterday, but tuned in just in time to hear this:

“If you want specifics with specific policies or countries go ahead and you can ask me. You can even play stump-the-candidate if you want to."

That's Gov. Palin's response to a question about her perceived lack of foreign policy experience. Sounds like it's time for the press to lock and load. What question would you ask if you had the chance?

Algebra problems? Trust your gut.

Our approximate number system has an effect on how well we do with mathematics. The report is here. To try your hand at an interesting experiment, go here - you'll have a split second to determine if there are more blue or yellow dots on the screen. Try it at least 25 times to get a good idea of your ability to approximate.

Column of the Day - JFK

Not a column, but a speech. JFK's innaugural address, January 20, 1961. Here's the first 10 minutes on video:

Return of the Caption Contest

You provide the caption, I'll narrow it down to the best three or four, then you vote for your favorite. Winner gets the undying love and admiration of his/her peers, and maybe a bonafide prize.

How do you do that hairdo that you do so well?

It takes 40 to 50 hours to make one SNL wig. See how Tina and Amy get the Sarah and Hillary look here.

Column of the Day - Gerrison Keillor

The voice of Lake Wobegon offers his account of the RNC:

I must say, it was fun having the Republicans in St. Paul and to see it all up
close and firsthand. Security was, as one might expect, thin-lipped and gimlet-eyed, but once you got through it, you found the folks you went to high school with -- farm kids, jocks, the townies who ran the student council, the cheerleaders, some of the bullies -- and they are as cohesive now as they were back then, dedicated to school spirit, intolerant of outsiders, able to jump up and down and holler for something they don't actually believe.

Break Time!

Under pressure? Sure you are. Let Queen and David Bowie remind you of what's really important.

No friend of Moose and Squirrel

From blueherald.com:

Where Joe Friday when you need him?

Jim Wallis longs for the days of Dragnet and Joe Friday, the LA detective who wanted "just the facts." Wouldn't that be nice this election season (from BOTH sides)?

He does mention one site worth checking after every new political ad: factcheck.org. You want fair and balanced? Go here. 

Column of the Day

David Brooks explains why experience matters. Governance requires prudence, he says, and prudence requires experience:

The prudent leader possesses a repertoire of events, through personal involvement or the study of history, and can apply those models to current circumstances to judge what is important and what is not, who can be persuaded and who can’t, what has worked and what hasn’t.

Who then, in this election, has experience? That's not for me to say; it wouldn't be prudent.

Of Revenge

A little something for those reading Hamlet: While Sir Francis Bacon argued that revenge was just dandy in certain situations, a new study suggests you're better off not trying it in the workplace. Of course, if you're Hamlet, you would've been better off if you'd just done something, anything!

Just say no . . . to bread?!?

Okay, APE Language students. . . try to follow the logic in this. 

The Future of the US Infrastructure

Courtesy of Tom Toles' (Washington Post) wit and pen.

Column of the Day

I don't agree with Thomas Friedman on a number of issues, but on this one, I'm in his corner. Instead of investing in the future, we're content with complacency. Key quote from yesterday's column:

Why would Republicans, the party of business, want to focus our country on breathing life into a 19th-century technology — fossil fuels — rather than giving birth to a 21st-century technology — renewable energy? As I have argued before, it reminds me of someone who, on the eve of the I.T. revolution — on the eve of PCs and the Internet — is pounding the table for America to make more I.B.M. typewriters and carbon paper. “Typewriters, baby, typewriters.”

Today's Moment of Irony

Even Karl Rove thinks the McCain ads have gone too far.

What, me think?

Last week, I mentioned Paul Reiser's comparision of the McCain-Palin ticket to the playground bully. Today, MoDo strikes a similar chord:

An Arctic blast of action has swept into the 2008 race, making thinking passé. We don’t really need to hurt our brains studying the world; we just need the world to know we’re capable of bringing a world of hurt to the world if the world continues to be hell-bent on misbehaving.

That's right, kids. Drop the books and hit the weight room. Truly, 'tis better to give than to receive. 

SNL's Open Season on Election 2008

All hail Fey and Poehler!

My New Name: Fog Piles Palin

That's what it would be if Sarah Palin had named me. Want to know your Palin name? Go here.

"If you don't vote, you're a moron"

So says Craig Ferguson, funny guy and new citizen of the US.

A novel idea

Voting for the most competent candidate. Making the suggestion is the most competent talking head, Rachel Maddow:

The Playground Campaign

Paul Reiser ("Mad About You") offers an extended metaphor for this year's campaign. Here's one of many witty remarks:

"I think the tone of this whole campaign would have been very different if Senator Obama had accepted my request for us to appear in town hall meetings all over America," the Senator from Arizona tells us.

Am I just losing my friggin' mind? Seriously. I keep looking around the room to see if I'm living in some suddenly altered state where everything we know is now called the opposite, and nobody notices. Or can stop it.

"I wish I didn't have to take your lunch money, but you should'nt of hadda brung it."

When Pig Stories Don't Fly

You know you've crossed the line when Bill O'Reilly doesn't agree with you:

"For anyone to say that Barack Obama consciously compared Mrs. Palin to a pig is unfair."

Investment Opportunity!

Buy shares of collagen manufacturers - NOW! (photo of Sarah Palin supporter in Alaska from Anchorage Daily News)

Something to think about on this day

He shall judge between many peoples,

and shall arbitrate between strong nations far away;

they shall beat their swords into plowshares,

and their spears into pruning hooks;  

nation shall not lift up sword against nation,

neither shall they learn war any more.

- Micah 4:3

Plan B

Just in case.

Column of the Day, The Sequel: Roger Ebert

Wow. Roger may have closed the "At The Movies" balcony, but he still knows a bad script and poor acting when he sees it.

Let's play 20 Questions

While we wait for her first media interview (only available on ABC's 20/20), here are 20 questions from ForeignPolicy.com they'd like to have answered by Sarah Palin. I'd like to hear her answer to #13. 

Pink Arrow Update

Holy cow! Not a pink t-shirt remains at the LHS Spirit Store or Pep Talk. Word is that Pep Talk will receive 1,000 before tomorrow's game, but many have been spoken for. If you want one, get to Pep Talk NOW!

Here's a suggestion for next year: Let's take this campaign across the OK Conference. Designate one week as the OK Pink Week, and have every sport, in every school, participate in cancer awareness projects. Coach Dean and the LHS football team have kicked off something very special in Lowell - let's encourage everyone to contribute!

In the Seventh Year - Column of the Day

Roger Cohen kicks it Old Testament-style in this commentary on the seven years since 9/11. Thou shalt read it, and be enlightened.

Why I'm Independent

The same reason Groucho Marx used in a letter to the Friar's Club:

"I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member."

Seven years on

Lest we forget. . . a video compilation of media coverage on September 11, 2001.

The Dick and Jane Hamlet

For my students still struggling with the Bard, I offer this elementary interpretation.

Of Lipstick and Animals

I'd like to make one thing perfectly clear: I'd never put lipstick on an animal.

Now that we've cleared that hurdle, let's look at Obama's full quote from yesterday's speech:

“John McCain says he’s about change, too — except for economic policy, health care policy, tax policy, education policy, foreign policy and Karl Rove-style politics. That’s just calling the same thing something different.”

With a laugh, he added: “You can put lipstick on a pig; it’s still a pig. You can wrap an old fish in a piece of paper called change; it’s still going to stink after eight years.”

And Palin's from last week:

"The only difference between hockey moms and pit bulls is lipstick!"

Okay, students of rhetoric, what do they have in common? If you answered, the word lipstick, you are correct. If you answered "Obama's making a sexist comment about Palin," you couldn't be further from the truth. Instead, you have conveniently ignored the context of Obama's speech (delivered to an Appalachian audience who would get the joke). Nevermind the fact that he is referring to McCain (who, as you recall, is the person really running against Obama), and not Palin.

Once again, pathos scores political points, and logos takes a holiday. Advantage: Republicans.

Wrong place, wrong time, wrong haircut

D'oh! I picked the wrong time to let my hair "grow out" again. A New Zealand airline is offering chrome domers cold hard cash if they put on a temporary tattoo ad. 

Column of the Day: David Brooks

Here's a good example of analysis and comparison/contrast for you APE Lang/EN 101 students. David Brooks examines the drastic change in the presidential campaign. Both make an argument for change, but as Brooks notes:

"The Obama change is more responsible and specific, but it has all the weirdness of a Brookings Institution report. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.) The McCain promise of change is comprehensive and vehement, though it’s hard to know how it would actually work in office."

Getting to know you. . .

While most of America was introduced to Sarah Palin last week, there are some who've known her for many years. Anne Kilkenny is one such person. Her opinion of Alaska's governor - both pros and cons - can be found here. 

Rhetoric is HOT!

Yeah, baby, bring on the antimetabole! Slate.com calls it "The Hottest Rhetorical Device of campaign '08".  And you thought that AP Language stuff was worthless. . . 

Education: Attention Must Be Paid

While the candidates debate who will really bring change (answer: either of them, duh), one issue that needs more time in the public eye is education. From EdWeek's blog Bridging Differences, some suggestions for the next president. Key quote: 

The habits of work and mind that schools instill can carry over, but teachers and schools should not be expected to wash away the effects of health care, nutrition, housing, poverty, abuse, street crime, and the extraordinarily high percentage of our young living in jail. In all these categories we out-perform every single other industrialized nation, and by such a long shot.

Today's APE Lang "Column"

Sometimes an editorial takes the shape of a well-designed graphic, such as this one from Bruce Handy in today's NY Times. 

Matthews and Olbermann get the boot, Maddow debuts

The boys won't anchor any more of MSNBC's major presidential campaign coverage. It's a smart move. Their work in Denver during the DNC looked less like journalism and more like College Gameday on ESPN. Fans of both guys still have Hardball and Countdown to enjoy. As for me, I'm looking forward to Rachel Maddow's new show - we'll be hearing from her for a long time. 

Real Men Wear Pink

Four days until Pink Arrow Night at LHS! Nice words this week about the project from Mick McCabe, prep sports writer for The Detroit Free Press. In addition to his column, he just released his Top 10 rankings for the week!

SUPER 10	w-l	division
1. Rochester Adams	2-0	2
2. East Grand Rapids	2-0	3
3. Hudsonville	2-0	2
4. Macomb Dakota	2-0	1
5. Lowell	2-0	2
6. Adrian	2-0	3
7. Muskegon	2-0	2
8. Rockford	2-0	1
9. Chelsea	2-0	3
10. St. Joseph	2-0	3

Another Big Bang

Listen for it later this week as the most-powerful atom smasher is revved up for the first time. Part of what it's supposed to do:

The first beams of protons will be fired around the 17-mile tunnel to test the controlling strength of the world's largest superconducting magnets. It will still be about a month before beams traveling in opposite directions are brought together in collisions that some skeptics fear could create micro "black holes" and endanger the planet.

Since it's all a bit confusing for your science-challenged blogger, I'll remind you of Alpinekat's stellar YouTube hit. It's easier to understand, and you can dance to it. 

Column of the Day - Robert Novak's Cancer

As we begin Pink Arrow week, Robert Novak's story of his brain tumor diagnosis seems like a timely read. 

The Return of the Column of the Day

Today's choice: Gail Collins of the NY Times. And the key quote:

Palin, whose state is more pork-laden than a barbecue stand, actually turned against the bridge project because she thought Washington might make Alaskans build it themselves. If she ever agrees to talk to a reporter, the interviewer should ask Palin whether she thinks a state that is extremely wealthy from oil and gas revenue should not be forswearing federal aid entirely so that less fortunate places can have more.

Really, a governor who puts her country first might think about that.

Oh, those do-nothing community organizers. . .

One of my favorites, Jim Wallis, thinks Sarah Palin (or McCain's speechwriters), owe our country's community organizers an apology. The details here. 

Hey, it's for a good cause!

How are your retinas doing? Burning, you say? Well, it's just for a week, and it's to remind you of a great cause that will reach a fever pitch on September 12. Pink Arrow Week will wrap up with the home football opener at Red (Pink?) Arrow Stadium against Holland High School. Remember, everyone wearing a Pink Arrow Force t-shirt gets in free. Shirts and other great Pink Arrow accessories are available at Pep Talk in downtown Lowell. T-shirts are also available at the LHS Spirit Store: $20 for adults, $15 for students. 

Alas, Poor Yakko

A scene from Hamlet, performed and translated by the Animaniacs:

Of Governors and Community Organizers

A comment posted to Mudflats ("Tiptoeing Through the Muck of Alaskan Politics"): "Jesus was a Community Organizer, and Pontius Pilate was a Governor."

Put that on your bumper and stick it.

Let's see, a new home or. . .

. . . a new outfit for the RNC? Vanity Fair estimates Cindy McCain's outfit at $300,000. 

Back to the Future - Eisenhower's Farewell

For those studying the "military-industrial complex" (you know who you are), here's where it was defined for a nation:

Final Thought

If Obama is "elite" and apparently condescending to the average American, why did Palin's speech use so much sarcasm and mockery, two trademarks of condescending speech?

Oh. My. Goodness.

Tonight's "entertainment" - Gretchen Wilson, Big or Rich (not sure which one), and Cowboy Troy, who is actually reciting part of the "I have a dream" speech. Surreal. 

Now I know who she reminds me of. . .

. . . one part Tracy Flick, one part Grace, the secretary in Ferris Bueller's Day Off.  

Palin's Big Moment

She's a confident speaker. Does an Ecclesiastes-type riff: "There's a time to campaign, and a time for leadership. . . " I have noticed, however, that when she gets excited, her pitch reaches a rather high level. A bit of "Fargo" from time to time. 

Okay, media ethics question for you: If you don't want your children to be part of the media's attention, why call so much attention to them during your speech? Does that open the door for questions from the media? 

Wait - her husband is a "proud. . . union member"? 

Now the small town talk - cue John Mellencamp, please. 

Cut to youngest daughter smoothing out Trig's wispy hair - she's adorable. But why put them on camera?

Ah, there's the comparison between mayor and community organizer we've been waiting for. Who is to say that the latter doesn't have responsibilities? Then she drops the phrase that could haunt Obama - the "clinging to guns and religion" line. 

Red Meat Special

10:25 PM: Wow. Rudy delivers. Red, raw, dripping with blood. It's not politically correct, it lacks quite a bit of logic, but that doesn't matter to this crowd. "Can you imagine how they're going to shake up Washington?" 

Rudy claims the Dems (Obama's staff) have questioned Palin's ability to serve as VP and be a mother of five. Problem with that statement: Obama's camp has NEVER said anything to that effect. 

And we're back!

10:00 PM: Rudy Giuliani's turn, complete with a NY sunset in the background. "This is the most important election of our lifetime, and we'd better get it right." Just before he took the stage, the cameras focused on Bristol and Trig Palin - they didn't ask for this attention, and I feel for them.

Rudy compares electing a president to hiring someone for a job. "Who am I going to hire?" he asks. Then he begins a rundown of each "resume" - the third time in 24 hours that we've heard about McCain's service and suffering. McCain is a hero for his service, no doubt. Now Obama's experience: an Ivy League education (that's a bad thing?), work as a "community organizer" (and lawyer, and college professor - but he doesn't mention that). 

MSNBC and others keep harping on whether or not each speaker is bringing the "red meat." Can we retire that term already?

And, like last week's "surprise" appearance by Obama after Biden's speech, we now know McCain is in the building, ready to take the stage following Palin's debut. 

"Barack Obama has never lead anything - nothing, nada!" And Rudy says Obama is the "least experienced candidate" in at least 100 years. Sort of like, um, I don't know. . . Abraham Lincoln?

Convention Audience Participation 101

MSNBC's Ann Curry just pointed out how female delegates are being moved toward the stage and men are being moved out, just in time for Palin's appearance. This isn't unusual, or underhanded, but it does indicate how scripted the conventions - of both parties - have become. 

Why wait? WOOD TV delivers news before it happens!

It's true! As of 9:46 PM, they claim Palin has concluded her speech, scheduled to be delivered fifteen minutes from now. 

The Return of the Live Blog - RNC Edition

9:31 PM: "I'm a Republican because I didn't want to grow up poor, waiting for the government to rescue me." Very effective line. But then he claims Palin "got more votes running for mayor. . .  than Joe Biden did running for President of the United States." Gets a loud response, but it makes no sense. First major example of logical fallacy tonight. 

9:25 PM: One of the better public speakers, Mike Huckabee, is up. Second speaker in a row to mention the "elite media." Well, at least they're no longer liberal. Elite, after all, means the best, right?

Huck drops a Madonna joke into the speech. He is a genuinely funny guy. His praise for Barack Obama's historic candidacy gets tepid applause. Then claims Obama brought back "European ideas" after his recent tour. Are we supposed to fear the ideas of our allies now? I'm a bit confused. 

9:13 PM: "USA! USA! USA!" And the backdrop looks like the world's largest Windows Vista screensaver. Romney gets the crowd fired up with comments about defeating "radical Islam." More defeated Republicans are coming up. Stay tuned.

9:05 PM: Romney is up, out of the gate and - OH! - he stumbles on a punchline. Reminds me of Barbaro at the Preakness. He adds a bit of the call and response stuff that made a number of Democratic speeches unbearable last week. He just called the Dems the party of "Big Brother" - has he read 1984? 

Preview of Palin's Speech

Found here at the National Review. She's taking it right to Obama (my italics):

"I had the privilege of living most of my life in a small town. I was just your average hockey mom, and signed up for the PTA because I wanted to make my kids’ public education better. When I ran for city council, I didn’t need focus groups and voter profiles because I knew those voters, and knew their families, too. Before I became governor of the great state of Alaska, I was mayor of my hometown. And since our opponents in this presidential election seem to look down on that experience, let me explain to them what the job involves. I guess a small-town mayor is sort of like a ‘community organizer,’ except that you have actual responsibilities." 

Missing Molly

While everyone watching MSNBC wonders "What Would Tim Russert Do?", I wonder what this race would look like with Molly Ivins' sharp wit. What would she think about Obama over Hillary? Of Sarah Palin? Sadly, we'll never know. She left some pretty big boots to fill. 

"Voice of God" dead at 68

Don LaFontaine, the voice of "In a world where ______" and many other movie trailer introductions, died this week. Here, he spoofs himself in an ad for Geico:

Good News, Bad News

Good news! Bristol Palin's getting some public support for her pregnancy. Bad news! It's from Jaime Lynn Spears, bonafide celebrity. 

Grrrrr. . . no powercord, therefore. . .

. . . no live blogging tonight's RNC. A better, funnier substitute is Dave Barry.

Alpinekat - We're so proud

It's not surprising to see Kate McAlpine getting tens of thousands of hits for this YouTube clip. Those of us who had the pleasure of teaching her back in the day knew we were working with genius. Enjoy.

No News, Good News (So Far)

While there's no joy in dealing with a hurricane, at least Gustav, as far as we know, didn't bring Katrina-like damage to the Gulf Coast. And kudos to the Republicans for keeping their convention on simmer while the storm moves on. Nice to see the always classy Laura Bush asking all of us to help the Red Cross. Okay, Cindy McCain was there, too. Looking a bit like Jane Jetson, but asking for help just the same.

New problem for the Republicans: Hanna is making her way towards Florida, and might hit around the time John McCain is scheduled to make the biggest speech of his life. And another storm, Ike, is right behind her.

As Jimmy Buffet said, "There's no tryin' to reason with hurricane season."

A Poem for the First Day of School

September, The First Day Of School - by Howard Nemerov

I

My child and I hold hands on the way to school,
And when I leave him at the first-grade door
He cries a little but is brave; he does
Let go. My selfish tears remind me how
I cried before that door a life ago.
I may have had a hard time letting go.

Each fall the children must endure together
What every child also endures alone:
Learning the alphabet, the integers,
Three dozen bits and pieces of a stuff
So arbitrary, so peremptory,
That worlds invisible and visible

Bow down before it, as in Joseph's dream
The sheaves bowed down and then the stars bowed down
Before the dreaming of a little boy.
That dream got him such hatred of his brothers
As cost the greater part of life to mend,
And yet great kindness came of it in the end.

II

A school is where they grind the grain of thought,
And grind the children who must mind the thought.
It may be those two grindings are but one,
As from the alphabet come Shakespeare's Plays,
As from the integers comes Euler's Law,
As from the whole, inseperably, the lives,

The shrunken lives that have not been set free
By law or by poetic phantasy.
But may they be. My child has disappeared
Behind the schoolroom door. And should I live
To see his coming forth, a life away,
I know my hope, but do not know its form

Nor hope to know it. May the fathers he finds
Among his teachers have a care of him
More than his father could. How that will look
I do not know, I do not need to know.
Even our tears belong to ritual.
But may great kindness come of it in the end.