"Al Gore Places Infant Son In Rocket To Escape Dying Planet"

Leave it to The Onion. The "Gore family crest" is priceless.

Brittany, Paris, and Obama?

Well, that's what the McCain campaign would have us think. Here's the ad in question:




A Newsweek blog calls it part of "McCain's Savvy Ad Strategy" but the NY Times chides the Arizona Senator for taking the "Low-Road Express". Your thoughts?

Word of Caution to Generation W (as in What?!?)

No matter which type of headphones you use, cranking up the iPod, Zune, or Zen is one way to lose a bit of your hearing much earlier in life.

Big Coal's Campaign of Lies

First, a confession: I bought the latest issue of Rolling Stone for my Jonas Brothers-loving daughter. But inside I found this article about the coal industry's ability to dupe all of us into thinking that coal is "clean." It's not even close. And, as I've posted before, mountain top removal threatens tens of thousands in the Appalachians.

"Then there's the environmental impact of mining, especially in Appalachia, where 'mountaintop removal' has already polluted 1,200 miles of streams and swallowed up entire communities. By the time the industry is finished, the EPA projects a loss of more than 1.4 million acres — an area the size of Delaware."

Next month, I'll try to meet with Congressman Vern Ehlers (R - MI) and encourage him to co-sponsor the Clean Water Protection Act. You can help too by visiting ilovemountains.com and getting in touch with your elected officials.

Happy Birthday, Melissa!

Birthday greetings to the classiest lady in Fort Morgan, CO!

HP & The Half-Blood Prince - The Trailer

Wall-E's World a Possible Reality

A new study suggests 86% of us could be obese by 2030. Enjoy that Big Mac.

Scrabulous no longer fabulous - on Facebook

Nothing like a lawsuit to make your point. Hasbro hired the big legal guns, and Facebook shut down Scrabulous. You can still play Hasbro's version on Facebook, or go to scrabulous.com, which seems to be working for now.

"Up in the air, Junior Birdmen"

The final frontier gets closer for the Average Joe. Sort of. Richard Bronson unveiled his $200,000-a-pop space plane, and a New Zealand inventor demonstrated "the world's first practical jetpack."

Vampires Suck!

And vampire energy sucks big time. Unplug the plasma, disengage the desktop, then see the full version of this graphic here.

A Pair of Op-Ed Picks

From the WaPo, Jamie Gorelick's take on news that Justice Department officials screened applicants for conservative tendancies (and favored them). One GR-based US attorney believes she was fired as a result. Why does this matter?

"(A lawyer's) ability to give that assurance has hinged on both the public perception -- and reality -- that the career assistant U.S. attorneys, line prosecutors and lawyers who work at the department are picked on their merits and proceed without regard to politics."

And from David Brooks of the NY Times, why education policies should be a focus of the November election. Key quote:

"The skills slowdown is the biggest issue facing the country. Rising gas prices are bound to dominate the election because voters are slapped in the face with them every time they visit the pump.But this slow-moving problem, more than any other, will shape the destiny of the nation."

He refers to education as "human capital policies." Nice.

My Level V Whitewater Experience - Photo Evidence

For those of you non-believers. . .

Dinner's Served in Estonia!

Your humble blogger's children are one-quarter Estonian, and this little gem shows the Estonian equivalent of Spam. Apparently they haven't read The Jungle over there yet.

Your Column D'Jour

An op-ed that provides some post-All Star Game perspective. The combined salary of MLB's best is nearly $400 million. Slice off a sliver of that, and a whole lotta' people could be helped. Read on.

Some Sunday Fun

You think your baby pictures are embarrassing?

And to think, all he got for his work was a teddy bear and a platinum record. The boy on Nirvana's Nevermind cover is now 17. (Image from Geffen Records.)

Now that Stella Artois owns Budweiser

Albert Pujols models the updated St. Louis Cardinals uniform.

A Weekend Plot Twist

Bummer. My daughter sprained her ankle, so our trip to Michigan's Adventure in now on hold. Silver lining? Yours truly will be home for the second season premiere of Mad Men.

Randy Pausch Passes at age 47

A few months ago, I posted a link to Randy Pausch's "Last Lecture". Pausch, who had an incurable form of pancreatic cancer, passed away early this morning. His book of the same name can be found here. I highly recommend it.

Lit Lounge AP Scores

Aw, shucks. You people make me look good. 76.6% passed the AP Language exam, and 75% passed the AP Literature. Well done! If you haven't received your score in the mail, give the school office a call - it might have been sent there.

Don't tell my nephew, Rueben James Brown Loafers

A judge in New Zealand has said no to parents naming their daughter Talula Does the Hula in Hawaii. I am not making this up.

Today's APE Lang Column - Robert Novak

He's in the news this week for hitting a pedestrian with his Corvette, but Robert Novak also took the Pentagon (and Democrats) to task for making the right to vote nearly impossible for our troops overseas.

JibJab's Latest

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In Heavy Rotation in the Lit Lounge

Sure, that Cyrus kid dropped a new one this week, but I'd like to offer a few alternatives that will save your audio souls. First, Paul Westerberg's (The Replacements) 49:00 is a steal at just 49 cents for the whole shebang at amazon.com. If hip-hop is more your thang, check Steinski's What Does It All Mean? for sensational sampling and production. Finally, Australia's Midnight Oil are given the deluxe treatment for Diesel and Dust, featuring "Beds Are Burning" and "The Dead Heart".

Ruining the Gauley/New River Area

There's no doubt that we need coal for our short-term energy needs. But blowing off the tops of mountains - now common practice in coal-rich states like West Virginia - causes major long-term harm for short-term gain. The Gauley Mountain is now a target for this irreversible procedure. You can stop it. Visit ilovemountains.org today. Please.

Satire - The New Yorker Obama Cover

Heads up, APE Language students! There's nothing better than a dose of satire to get the Lit Lounge into a knock-down, drag-out discussion, and the best example of satire this summer (and probably the most misunderstood) is last week's New Yorker cover featuring a cartoon of Barack and Michelle Obama. This week, Vanity Fair presented a parody of the satiric cover with John and Cindy McCain. Both are pictured above for your amusement.

Some Wednesday Fun from the Muppets

Time Off for Good Behavior and Birthday Cake

The keeper of the Lit Lounge turns another year older today, so he's giving himself the afternoon and evening off to hang with his shorties, savor some steak, and down a slice of Bill Knapp's Celebration Cake. Back tomorrow with more, y'all.

All Hail "The Dark Knight"

Yes, the Lit Lounge was part of the record box office last weekend. "The Dark Knight" is so much more than a comic book movie; it's a classic tragedy with well-developed characters (thanks to the Nolan Bros. excellent screenplay), brilliant acting (Heath Ledger is amazing, as is Christian Bale), and stunning cinematography (see how many Chicago sites you recognize). But it is not a film for young kids. That's why I was stunned to see a tow-headed boy, maybe 8 or 9, right in front of me yesterday. What's more surprising is how many parents take their kids to a movie like this and complain about the violence - what were they thinking?

The balcony is closed. Forever. Bummer.

Movie criticism made the jump from print to television via Siskel and Ebert on PBS. The pair moved from public to mainstream TV with great success, and Roeper joined Ebert after Siskel's death in 1999. Sadly, Ebert's own battle with cancer has left him without a voice, leaving Roeper to spar with guest co-hosts for the last two years. Today, the pair called it quits. For diehard Ebert fans, there's always his website.

Shout out to Sanger Whitewater!

I'm still giddy after my whitewater rafting experience on the New River last week. Our group had the amazing Mike as our river guide - dude got some serious air and stuck the landing when we dumped at the end of our trip! If you're going to hit the raging rapids of West Virginia, do it with Sanger Whitewater.

Wasted Moments - a Thomas Freidman Column

When not harping on the flat world and globalization, Thomas Freidman often took the Bush Administration to task for wasting the opportunity to unify Americans post-9/11. Yesterday, he added 4/11 - symbolic of the national average of $4.11/gallon for gas - as a wasted moment to break our addiction to oil. He compares it to a crack addict:

When a person is addicted to crack cocaine, his problem is not that the price of crack is going up. His problem is what that crack addiction is doing to his whole body. The cure is not cheaper crack, which would only perpetuate the addiction and all the problems it is creating. The cure is to break the addiction.

Column of the Day

Okay, it's been a while since I've left one of these (if you've looked around the Lit Lounge lately, you know why). It's a "classic" NY Times op-ed from 2003, written by Khaled Hosseini, author of The Kite Runner. Since Barack Obama made a visit to Afghanistan last week, Hosseini's piece is worthwhile reading.

Get ready, we're coming home!

Friday is almost finished, and we are tired, exhausted, and spiritually refreshed. We worked together on some extreme weeding today in historic Lewisburg. The guys ganged up on an obstinate shrub while the ladies plowed through piles of weeds to clear space for a future yard. We ended our afternoon in a Civil War cemetery for a closer view of US History.

It's been an incredible adventure, and while the kids have been great, we're all more than ready to hit the road and sleep in familiar surroundings. Hope to see you all in church this Sunday when the kids share a little during the children's message. Thanks to everyone for their support to get us here - you've made a big difference in the lives of many, many people.

From the top: The kids take to the weeding this morning, Moby the Van is ready to head home, Kevin tears into the shrub that wouldn't die, and a tombstone in the Lewisburg Civil War cemetery.

Don't disturb my clutter

From the "I told you so" file: sometimes, more clutter means less stress, according to this article in Self. A key quote:

Order and predictability may sound better, but mess, it turns out, has its own rewards, even if you can't always see them at the time. “A chaotic period can be a catalyst for greater understanding,” says Rabbi Irwin Kula, author of “Yearnings: Embracing the Sacred Messiness of Life” (Hyperion). “Ambivalence, contradictions and tension ultimately give rise to wisdom.”

If that's true, I might be the wisest person I know.

Happy Birthday, Kyle! (or, "It felt like the worst spanking of my life!")

Careful, now. Don't get ahead of me . . . while today is Kyle's 17th birthday, there was no spanking in West Virginia. That quote refers to the reaction of Kate Quinn after flying off Jump Rock, a 25-30 foot drop into the New River. (She's fine, Ann. We all jumped off the rock, even Pastor Tracey!)

Austin did make New River history when he found himself caught in a "hydraulic" that kept him between a rock and a hard place for quite a few seconds before being pulled to safety by one of our river guides. Kevin also spent some time under our raft, but kept his cool and popped right back up.

Our white-water rafting trip is something we'll never forget. Awesome doesn't even begin to describe the sensation of soaring along Stage V rapids or tipping our rafts on purpose as we approached a massive rock. Awesome does describe the painful sunburn on my pasty white legs (photos to come - just thought I'd prepare you). A few ibuprofen and a gallon of aloe vera should do the trick.

Pictured above is the New River Gorge bridge, the largest arch bridge in the Western Hemisphere. That's not us in the raft, but we did go through the same pass at the end of our trip!

Our New Poet Laureate

Is Kay Ryan, of California. "Green Hills" is a sample of her compact style.

Their green flanks
and swells are not
flesh in any sense
matching ours,
we tell ourselves.
Nor their green
breast nor their
green shoulder nor
the languor of their
rolling over.

Fat Boy - RIP

Just down the street from your humble blogger, the Fat Boy closed its doors this month, thereby preventing countless clogged arteries with its amazing array of greasy spoon delights. Maybe someone will buy the property and reopen it. At the top is the now defunct diner immortalized in a Zippy the Pinhead comic strip. (photo from GR Press)

Save Energy, Save the Mountains

Our focus in WV tonight was mountaintop removal, a process that blows up the tops of mountains throughout Appalachia to get to the precious coal underneath. While it's a much more efficient way to mine, it leaves a permanent scar on the pristine hills and valleys of West Virginia, Virginia, Kentucky, and Tennessee. The Bush Administration has helped their coal industry donors keep up this practice, but you can help the people of Appalachia reclaim their land, their clean water, and their heritage.

Please visit ilovemountains.org or christiansforthemountains.org to see how simple it is to take action. Write a member of congress. Turn off your lights. Raise the temp on the AC. Pray.

(graphic from NY Times)

West Virginia Wednesday

Another beautiful day in Greenbrier County, WV. We wrapped up our work on Elmo's house and helped stain one woman's porch. All of us gathered at a new site just underneath a bridge that crosses the Greenbrier River to help shovel dirt and put up a tin roof. Kyle earned the title of "Top Dog" for his extraordinary climbing abilities (plus, he was the only one daring enough to climb up on the roof). The rest of the caterpillar crew carefully hauled one piece of tin after another to the guys up top.

Last night, we offered our talents to lead the evening's worship. We also enjoyed a performance by John Wyatt, a local folksinger.

Tomorrow, we hike to Hiko for our well-earned day off - the white water rafting we've been waiting for!

From the top: The House of Elmo, the new construction site, the girls dig their Wednesday assignment, Kyle gets carried away, and the caterpillars lift a hot piece of tin to the roofers.

Goodnight from Alderson

A few more pics before signing off this Tuesday evening: Rev. Kyle offers to baptize y'all in the Greenbrier River, Kevin suffers the stings and arrows of outrageous hornets, the boys prepare to leap into the river, Chris and the West Virginia countryside, and Tessa displays her everyday cheerful disposition.

Rocket Man meets Ben and Jerry

Sure, he's sold a bizillion albums, but Elton John didn't really make it until now. To honor his upcoming Vermont concert, Ben and Jerry have created "Goodbye Yellow Brickle Road" ice cream. Wild spectacles sold separately.

Live from West Virginia, Tuesday Edition

Teams Moby and Ahab (named after our gigantic white whale of a van and its close-but-never-able-to-catch-up counterpart) took on two jobs today. Ahab's girls continued work on the House of Elmo and Chris took the boys of Moby up the mountain to tear the roof off a mobile home. Only one minor incident: Kevin was attacked by a hornet, but his stomach has returned to its normal appearance. As for the girls, let's just say the swarms are keeping them on their toes. Most everyone has enjoyed a dip in the local swimming hole (Greenbrier River), and we're all looking forward to our sidetrip to Hiko, WV on Thursday for whitewater rafting!

From the top: Proof that Kate Q. is working, Maria adds a little latex look to her cheek, your humble blogger adds another coat to the House of Elmo, Team Ahab is all smiles after another day on the job.

We're on a Mission - Pics, Pt. One

From the top: Getting ready to put our noses to the grindstone in WV, the cousins prepare to paint, Maria and Austin apply a first coat, Ben pontificates and masticates, Tracey takes a quick snooze.

Greetings from Alderson, WV!

Much to our surprise, there's a bit 0f unsupervised wi-fi 100 yards away from our location, so I thought we should make the most of it and drop a post or two while we still have a signal. We've completed our first day of mission work - painting a home for Elmo Davis, and cleaning out a B & B used by vistors to the local minimum-security prison for women. An added bonus was stumbling upon the site made famous by the John Henry legend (the Steeldriving Man). Very cool!

Photos to come once yours truly has had a chance to catch up on some sleep and hit the showers. Our trip here took a bit longer than anticipated due to "Build an ark, Noah" conditions. Try driving a 15-passenger van in the hills of West Virginia after seeing a semi making use of a runaway truck ramp!

Low Cost Smart Boards with Nintendo Wii

As the Lit Lounge gets a much needed carpet replacement and ceiling-mounted data projector, there's one more thing we could use: a Smart Board. You know, those white board thingys that allow you to use them as touch screens.

Well, put that extra bond money aside, and let Johnny Lee of Carnegie Mellon save you loads of moolah by using a Wii remote and homemade infrared pen. I'll supply the materials if any Lit Lounge techies can put them together!

Speaking of the Environment. . .

Our President left the G8 summit in a joking mood, saying "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter." Classy.

We're on a mission. . . from God.

Your Lit Lounge Lizard-in-Chief is off to West Virginia for a week of house rehab in the Appalachians. It's an impoverished area, one hit hard by mountain top removal. I STRONGLY encourage you to visit ilovemountains.org and see how your area is connected to this destructive means of mining.

I'm taking the laptop along for the ride, but can't promise that I'll be posting this week. I can promise to get everyone up to speed after our safe return home. Have a great week!

Good News for Darfur

Sudan's president will be charged with genocide next week. But some U.N. higher-ups think that could make peace efforts more difficult in Darfur.

Serenity Now?

We're familiar with the Serenity Prayer ("God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. . ."), and some might know that it's author is theologian Reinhold Niebuhr. Or so it seemed.

Best Booker of All Time!

And the award goes to. . . Salman Rushdie for Midnight's Children! His 1981 classic about the life of a boy born at beginning of India's independence from Britain was voted the best Booker Prize winner of all time. (APE Lit students will be mildly disappointed that our favorite, Life of Pi, did not make the final cut.)

New Work from Barbara Ehrenreich

One of the most hotly debated writers in last year's APE Lang class was Barbara Ehrenreich, author of Nickled and Dimed: On Not Getting By in America. Her latest, This Land Is Their Land: Reports From a Divided Nation, is the focus of this interview with Time.

Lyle Lovett: Great Songs + Good Sales = No Income

Sad but true. One of the best songwriters out there hasn't made squat from his recordings. Lyle Lovett makes a living touring the country, and he's at the Meijer Gardens this week. See him if you can. Or buy one of his CDs - I recommend "Pontiac" or his latest, "It's Not Big, It's Large."

Just Say No To Crack

Flint is doing something about its crime rate. First step, ban baggy, saggy pants.

"The Office" Webisodes Begin Today!

This summer, our "special" guy, Kevin, tries to get rid of his gambling debt. Find the fun here.

Not Always the Best Medicine?

Seems that some folks fear laughter. So says the International Society for Humor Studies (that's enough to make me chuckle). In addition to discussing gelotophobia, the funny experts concluded that democracies make for poor joke material. They obviously haven't checked with Jon Stewart on this.

For U of M Fans

A little bit of fun at the expense of celebrities and the state of Ohio. Enjoy.

Say it Ain't So!

The corner of Michigan and Trumbull will never look the same: Tiger Stadium, former home of the Tigers and Lions, and host of so many boyhood memories, is on the way down.

Signs of Life in Music

Good news, music fans: Paste reports that Ben Folds and Todd Snider will drop new discs soon. Add those to the new Hold Steady release next week, and I'm a happy camper.

Today's APE Lang Column

For years, Sports Illustrated subscribers would grab each new issue and turn to the back of the mag to read Rick Reilly's weekly gem. Then the dude jumped ship to ESPN. Fortunately, dear Lounger, his work can be found online. This week, a how-to (APE Lang-speak: process analysis) on losing millions after being drafted in the NBA.

Yummmmmmmmm

Is there any better cookie than the Toll House Chocolate Chip? I think not. Alas, Ruth Wakefield is the apparent creator of the gooey treat, not my mother. The trick, pictured above in the NY Times photo, is sprinkled sea salt before baking. Try it yourself.

AP Scores, Anyone?

The AP scores have been available via phone for a week or so, and they should arrive in test-taker mailboxes this week. Except in Mission Viejo, CA, where 385 students got a big ol' zero because a number of them were caught cheating.

Home from Memphis (TN) after a Delay in Memphis (IN)

What a great weekend - great music, museums, food, and fireworks! After a looooong delay in Memphis, IN (did a u-turn in the median to avoid being stuck for hours), we arrived in GR around 2 AM Monday. A few of the finer moments are posted above. (Top to bottom: Striking a pose with The King's mic, Big Jerry's band on Beale, nearly finished products at the Gibson factory, and Shangri-La Records.)

Time's Cover Story

Mark Twain graces the cover of Time's annual Making of America issue. APE Lit students take note: I might add ol' Huck Finn to our reading this year, so you ought to check out this article.

Social Skills Replace Survival Skills at Summer Camp

I'm heading to West Virginia next week for a mission trip, and I'm told there's no cell tower nearby. That means no tech stuff for a week. But, as Nancy Gibbs writes, that's one reason to send the kids off to summer camp: no texting (OMG!) or surfing.

Lit Lounge Is Back!

Yes, yes, I know you missed your daily dose of columns, so I'll toss in plenty today to make up for my absence. First, Frank Rich's "Wall-E for President" from Sunday's NY Times.

The Lord of the Dance

Matt Harding traveled to 42 countries to make this little gem. Try not to smile while watching.

Walkin' In Memphis

The Lit Lounge is hitting the road and heading to Memphis, TN tonight. Here's wishing everyone a Happy (and safe) Fourth of July! We'll be back in business late Sunday night.

If You Give a Million Monkeys Laptops

You might get something produced that makes sense, at least what some have said. The folks at 1000000 Monkeys Typing are putting the theory to the test at their way creative site. As they put it, it's "An evolutionary writing site. Only the strongest stories survive." Grab a vine and add to the fun.

Book Drive for Baghdad and Basra

One way to encourage democracy is to encourage the education of a nation. Iraq needs books, and Christopher Hitchens explains what you can do to help. Here's the address to send one or two new books:

Nathan Musselman
The American University of Iraq—Sulaimani
Building No. 7, Street 10
Quarter 410
Ablakh Area
Sulaimani, Iraq
(+964) (0)770-461-5099

Sounds like a perfect project for the Lit Lounge.

Lit Lounge Around the World

Just for fun, I added the Sitemeter application to the blog about two months ago. It allows me to track who's dropping by the Lounge and where they're from. In that time, we've had visitors from across the country, and from Canada, Colombia, Brazil, England, Sweden, Australia, Lithuania, Indonesia, Germany, Spain, and the Czech Republic, to name a few. UPDATE (7/2)! EGYPT is on board!

If you are just dropping by, leave a comment and let us know how you found the Lit Lounge. We love a good story.

I'm depressed, but that's okay

Shortly after I began my teaching career, I felt I couldn't stay focused, and I had a terrible time trying to balance a new job with my role as a husband and relatively-new dad. Since every other kid in my school was being checked for ADD, I thought I'd do the same. I underwent a battery of tests only to be diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

Nothing makes you feel more depressed than being diagnosed with depression. The stigma attached to the disease isn't what it used to be, but it affects so many in many different ways. I was prescribed a number of meds before finding one that works, and I'm on that one to this day. Medication isn't enough for most depressed persons; therapy can be very effective in treating the disease. I've had my share of therapy sessions, too.

I cringe when I hear that people "suffer" from depression. I don't. I live with it. I try to recognize when it's getting the best of me and rely on certain strategies to deal with it. Some of them can be found here.

The bottom line: If you know someone who might be depressed, encourage him or her to see a doctor for a test. Yeah, sometimes I think having ADD would've been easier, but I also know that one can have a very happy life living with depression.

Let's celebrate at Biggby!

Starbucks is closing 600 locations. That's change I can believe in.